The Skinny on Saturday Night (Fashion Only Forum 12/18/00)

So Nelson was off doing something else. I think he was at some twelve step thing for depressing people or something. I really didn't want to know. But he let me use his studio.

I'd arranged to meet two models at the studio to do some sensuous photography. At the request of some members of the, uh, lesbian leather community. (When I was a kid, "community" meant a place with sidewalks and picket fences and things.)

The models squabbled over who got to be tied up first. As the first down would be the last up, both wanted to be the last one up and wreak whatever revenge she felt necessary before ending the shoot. So both wanted to be the first one tied up. I picked the tall curvy redhead. While she stripped, the short brunette put on her leather and spikes and black makeup. Then I tied the tall one, facing criticism from the short one on the aesthetics of my ropework. I was a Boy Scout - I know how to tie up a girl. As I loaded the old Pentax, the Top started warming up the bottom so we'd get some real excitement on film. And we did.

The one with her hands free took a break every once in awhile for some cheap vodka, asking me to keep the bottom entertained in the interim. As it was necessary to the quality of the pictures, I did what had to be done. Every once in awhile I had to use baby wipes to clean black lipstick off some part or other. Baby wipes feel chilly.

Inevitably, the Top got pretty ripped, and decided to swap tongues with me, as she'd been doing with Red. Instinct and years of training made my immediate reaction one of cooperation, until I noticed that she was both unable to stand without support, and was unzipping my trousers. My mother didn't raise me to turn down a good deal, but I also didn't care to incur the possibility of the girl falling down with an important part of me between her teeth, so, with the best imitation of chivalry, I disengaged her, laid her on the floor and unbound the tall one so we could decide the best course of action.

The best course of action turned out to be dressing the brunette in an old nightshirt Nelson keeps around when he doesn't want overnight company to see him walking around naked. (I'd think that would be all company.) Then we packed everything up and I carried her out to the car, realizing just how badly I need regular exercise, and we took her to Red's house to sleep it off.

We got one roll of good pictures and I arranged to shoot Red for a makeup artist that has something particular in mind. The next morning, the brunette was just fine, and Red was still hungover. I hadn't even noticed her drinking.

Fran Bilder
Private Photographer